Discoveries and they aren't my addict's....

I finally got my copy of the family support manual used in the 12 Step program over a week ago.  It was a rough week earlier this past week and I finally broke down and decided to read the steps.  I focused on the first three my eyes were opened.  I decided to get a notebook to do some journaling specifically about the things I learned while I worked the steps.  Last night after group I finally had a chance to read over Step 1 again and do some soul searching.

Boy, was that a mistake.  J/K (well, sort of)!  I haven't even answered all the questions yet (my first goal in working the steps) when I came across some hard realizations about myself.  I share this because I think (at least for me personally) it's almost easier to deal with (cope with, ignore, whatever coping mechanism you choose to use) than to deal with our own issues.  It was an eye-opening experience and I expect this journey will provide many more such experience to come.

I didn't realize that because I was letting my loved one's addiction consume me that I no longer had the ability to focus and fulfill my responsibilities and own my choices.    I no longer was in control of my life because my focus was controlling my loved one's choices in relation to addiction and recovery.  I loved that it addressed the fact as we come to terms with the fact that we are powerless over others - and even our own negative emotions - we feel the darkness lift and sense hope in the distance and this only comes thru our Savior, Jesus Christ